An Ocean Gazes Through Human Glass by Emily Nguyen

Author:Emily Nguyen [Nguyen, Emily]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: River Grove Books

TWENTY-EIGHT

IRAMIR WALKED UP THE STAIRS BACK TO HER OFFICE. THE LION that escorted her kept nudging its head into her hand. They would hardly leave her out of their sight, and while she much preferred staying within the laboratories to continue work on a new engine, there was nowhere else for privacy. She just wanted a moment to herself, a break from the people and the stares of their expectations.

A new engine from the proof of concept, of impossible hearts within crystal cages, would be made to control the ocean. Effort would be revitalized and so would the bloodlust. People were broken down into the weights of their contributions, by the worth of their theories or the worth of their physical bodies and the materials they contained. They could not help but be expectant. The Library’s salvation waited behind stark white walls and industrious machinery. It had never been closer.

The way Grimleer and his researchers trusted her and congratulated her made her little secret ever harder to hold. She was not known for half-measures. It was absurd that she could undermine her divine duty just to save one man. Yes, entirely ridiculous to hold Eram in such regard. She barely knew him, only his name and vague scraps of livelihood. Idle chatter just to pass the time, hardly poor conversation. She was quite used to others who were easily lost in their own reverie, where she only needed a passing reply to keep them going. It was a nice reprieve to feel included in such a way, pretending to explore any topic outside work.

These people urged themselves. They desired to be exceptional beyond the means of their current circumstances, a motive Iramir could not quite grasp. Their ambition and blind faith led them to believe, despite everything, that all would be well. She had often said that all would be well, or some close approximation of that, but by no means did she ever think she had made it. She was made to do as she was told, and she was committed to predestination still, just with a flagrant omission of the real engine.

What wonders the Library could do with an already functioning engine despite his name, despite everything that had brought him before her. A life measured by his own contributions and an ocean could be made to contribute infinity. She had brought him to the Library fully intent to break him down and find out what he was. It would have been unfortunate, Eram’s death, but necessary.

This resolve had shattered once Samuel pressed her. To be free, to live outside. It did not feel right to stand before the world, having stolen another’s place to behold it. All those moments attempting to be tender with Eram would turn into nothing. Eram was what could have been, like what Samuel had claimed, and to ensure Eram’s continuation satisfied her. It had to satisfy her, this scant, fragile interaction with the outside.

She tugged on the lion’s ears, feeling its soft velvety fur against her living skin but feeling nothing with her ceramic portions.

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